It has happened.
I have purchased Trans Wizard Harriet Porber and the Bad Boy Parasaurolophus
Will provide updates
IT’S HERE
I’m going to start it pretty soon. I’m for some reason locked out of my student account and email and IT was no help as usual, so what is there to do except read a parody romance novel written specifically to spite J.K. Rowling?
Chuck Tingle has more or less become a meme because of his bizarre titles and covers and because of the Hugo fiasco, but I’ve heard relatively little about what it’s like to actually read his work and I frankly have no idea what to expect or if I should go into this with expectations at all
This book is…surprisingly easy to take seriously as a book. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. But it’s like. A Book and not just an extended joke. Like on some level it’s not particularly terribly written nor does the plot like, completely exist in service to the…whatever humor is derived from the self-aware absurdity of the premise
AFSGFBCHH??
I love that he’s not even described as a humanoid dinosaur. He’s just sexy goth tattooed Severus snape and he’s also a parasaurolophus and we are left to just figure it out
I have to talk about what is going on with the worldbuilding. Like this is a parody. Of Harry Potter. But there’s an entirely different magic system and….everything???
In summary
- there doesn’t appear to be a statute of secrecy type thing magic is just fully integrated with the modern world and modern technology
- Harriet is a wizard, but that means that she creates spells by typing them out in long manuscripts, which on one level is a nod to the book publishing industry but on another level is kind of interesting in of itself
- there’s a??? spellcasting industry??
- there are different types of magic users other than wizards, and they appear to be based on the d&d classes
- or at least, bards exist and they are distinct from wizard
- the dinosaur is a bard
- Bigfeet exist and they are integrated with modern society
- there are sentient motorcycles and no one finds this in any way unusual
- THE DINOSAUR IS A BARD?!?!?!
…Warlocks in this world get their powers from a pact with Chuck Tingle
The fourth wall break is killing me.
The sexy dinosaur is also trans
As much as I love skillfully crafted satire that takes deft jabs at the flaws of the thing it’s lampooning, there’s also something charming about how every character in this book has a name blatantly and hilariously derived from a Harry Potter character regardless of how most of their roles in the story barely resemble anything like characters in Harry Potter.
…You know, I’m not even sure Chuck Tingle has read Harry Potter.
I’m back to reading. Does chocolate milk have intoxicating effects on sentient motorcycles??
…sentences I never thought I’d write
um im lowkey getting feels from this like there are some genuinely emotionally resonant bits in here what the fuck
chuck tingle’s magic system is unironically better than jk Rowling’s I’m sorry
I’m so sorry to sample the sex scene but. “sexualis secondus” just killed me. I have been pronounced dead by this book. im obliterated this is indescribable
I.
I literally have no idea how to describe what I’m experiencing right now. Like this is a somewhat poorly edited parody adult dinosaur romance novel but. It’s genuinely?? Creative?? In a lot of ways???? And there’s a lot of heart to it, a lot of genuine powerful messages about identity and about art and creativity and the fourth-wall-breaking device is…I can’t explain it because that would spoil it but it’s actually pulled off so well?????
This is not like, a humorous joke story this guy did for Being a Little Shit and Spite reasons, it’s like actually in its themes and message a genuine “fuck you” to j.k. Rowling’s transphobia even though it’s this absolutely wild janky batshit story and I have never experienced anything like this in my LIFE
I did not expect my adhd little heart to be touched by understanding of my fears about creativity and writing and its place in my life. Not like this. What the fuck. What the fuck.
FGDHXWGBKVGSSHBIIDQTVJKBSZVYSTVJKJVBXSGHXHVN
Can you even imagine being this spiteful
the news is bad sometimes
Okay but what’s the phone
thats what cain used to kill abel
Okay but for real think of the possibilities.
- People in remote areas (both recreationally and living) - hiking or dangerous areas if they’re lost, hurt, or scouting ahead
- Homeless people
- Disabled people (to alert for help or contact vital services
- Areas of extreme poverty (see all above)
- Lost people (either urban or rural) able to call for help
- Somebody close to death able to record all final thoughts (either injured, terminal, trapped, or unable to have constant medical care)
- Children always able to call for help
- Abused people - hiding a phone without worrying about it needing to be recharged
it isn’t bad at all, we’re just so used to phone companies trying to make paper thin phones with no battery life cause it’s good for business
At 40, Franz Kafka (1883-1924), who never married and had no children, walked through the park in Berlin when he met a girl who was crying because she had lost her favourite doll. She and Kafka searched for the doll unsuccessfully. Kafka told her to meet him there the next day and they would come back to look for her.
The next day, when they had not yet found the doll, Kafka gave the girl a letter "written" by the doll saying "please don't cry. I took a trip to see the world. I will write to you about my adventures."
Thus began a story which continued until the end of Kafka's life.
During their meetings, Kafka read the letters of the doll carefully written with adventures and conversations that the girl found adorable.
Finally, Kafka brought back the doll (he bought one) that had returned. “It doesn't look like my doll at all," said the girl.
Kafka handed her another letter in which the doll wrote: "my travels have changed me." the little girl hugged the new doll and brought her happy home.
A year later Kafka died. Many years later, the now-adult girl found a letter inside the doll. In the tiny letter signed by Kafka it was written:
"Everything you love will probably be lost, but in the end, love will return in another way."
soft in the middle, shelby eileen // 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes, david “doc” luben
metricjenn